I don’t have specific data on the percentage of women who experience feelings of loss and attachment once their children leave home to start their lives as adults. But, I do know from experience as a mother who watched her children pack up their belongings before saying a final “I love you” and “I’m going to be alright” how your motherly love can overwhelm you. Even as you try to stifle the tightness in your throat,your resolve to be brave crumbles once that child heads for the door.
In the beginning because we’ve raised our children from infancy to adulthood only to suddenly and seemingly lose them to some unknown beckoning thing called “life” tears and feelings of helplessness will become our constant companion. The thing to remember in all of that initial crisis mode is knowing that they’re feeling ready to spread their wings & stand on their own. Just like birds fly from their nests to survive on their own… so must our children.
After a few weeks of their not being where they usually are in the home, you will adjust to that empty child’s room and those personal nuances that filled up empty spaces of living family life . Recently, I learned that a dear family member was attempting to adjust to her eldest son going off to college. I know she’ll miss him , but I also know of her strength and she will come to terms with her son starting a life separate from hers.
Meredith Veira, formerly of The View, spoke often about how she missed her son when he started his first year of college. She bravely fought back tears as she expressed her feeling to her cast members & the audience. It helps to continue to do things that you love. Don’t wallow in grief. Your child isn’t gone completely & they will 9 times out of 10 prove it by showing up unexpectedly more times that you’d like when it’s all said and done:)
It’s not so bad when your children decide to leave the safety of your loving arms. You will survive it by keeping the faith, staying prayful and keeping busy. As the years pass, you’ll wonder what all the hoopla was about!
Peace & blessings to you.
Are you an empty-nester? Feel free to share your experiences@ authentic woman.
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